by AJ Gold
This year marks the first annual WHS Substitute Teacher Basketball All-Star Game, and the hype is real. The Veterans are set to square off against the Young Guns in the inaugural matchup. While the Veterans bring in loads of experience and a savvy knack for getting to the hole, the Young Guns bring in unmatched athleticism, always looking to push the ball. The matchups look to be entertaining, to say the least.
April Fool's Issue
One of the key players for the Veterans is starting point guard Mr. Lawrence, aka, “L-Train.” With unparalleled court vision and an Allen Iverson-esque crossover, Lawrence’s assist-to-turnover ratio is tops in the nation, and his highlight reel of ankle-breaking handles is going to be a nightmare for the Young Guns to deal with.
Starting at small forward is seasoned leader Mr. Fredas, the team’s leading scorer. Fredas, who is actually endorsed by Rec Specs and has his own player edition goggles, has got unlimited range from deep, often bombing multiple 3’s per game. But Fredas’ game is multi-dimensional; he’s explosive off the dribble and is always a threat to throw down a rim-shattering slam.
But the Young Guns have a solid defensive plan: Mr. Flannery, who will be starting opposite Fredas, is one of the best lockdown defenders in the country. Currently a leave-replacement teacher, he’s opted to go back to his subbing roots for the game. With quick feet and even quicker hands, he’s always a threat to pick your pocket and go coast to coast.
The x-factor for the Young Guns is Mr. Suri. At a limber 6’10, his prowess in the post is a force to be reckoned with. Touted for his incredible shot-blocking ability and his through-the-roof hops, he could be too athletic for the less energized Veterans.
But the Young Guns may have another problem on their hands; Mr. Egenton is pulling a Jordan and coming out of retirement to suit up for the Veterans. Get your popcorn ready WHS, this one should be a game for the ages.