The Student News Site of Westfield High School

Hi's Eye

The Student News Site of Westfield High School

Hi's Eye

The Student News Site of Westfield High School

Hi's Eye

Rebecca Bueller’s day off

by Rebecca Smoot 
How could I be expected to handle school on a day like this? A beautiful day in the 07090, only miles away from the greatest city in the world. It would be a crime to be forced into something as terrible as school. 
This is my ninth sick day. It’s tough coming up with new illnesses. If I go for 10, I’ll have to barf up a lung, so I’d better make this one count. Life moves pretty fast; if you don’t stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it. So why not hop on NJ Transit and spend a couple hours in the concrete jungle? 
 I do have a test today, that wasn’t made-up. It’s on European socialism. What’s the point? I’m not European, so who cares if they’re socialists? They could be fascist anarchists, it still wouldn’t buy me a car. 
The best way to get your parents to call you out of school? You fake a stomach cramp, and when you’re bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms. It’s a little childish and stupid, but then again, so is high school. 
On the agenda for today? Times Square, a park or two and definitely some of the best food in the city—burgers. But who knows what else is in store? The main goal? Not getting caught. 
M&M’S World in Times Square is the way to go. You can snag tons of free M&M’S and don’t have to deal with the crowds at Hershey’s Chocolate World… amateurs. They also have apparel for anyone looking to wear the M&M’S, instead of eating them (1). 
  After all this chocolate, I need to slow things down and take a stroll in one of the beautiful parks that the city has to offer. Nothing can fix a stomach cramp like a good old-fashioned carousel ride; it’s just what the doctor prescribed (2).
Walking can really tire a person out; food is essential to surviving a day like today. The perfect place to eat? Shake Shack. Except one slight little problem—my teacher is here. Four thousand restaurants in the downtown area, I pick the one Mr. Hynes goes to (3).
He recognized me from 50 yards away. One can only expect to have some kind of run-in while ditching school. I couldn’t be in that much hot water, though— he was doing the same. Turns out, he needed a day off too. 
With the day starting to wind down, I think I’ll ask my newfound friends what they’ve enjoyed today. We’ve seen everything good, we’ve seen the whole city. We went to a museum and saw priceless works of art (4). However, Mr. Hynes was still unimpressed.
Ladies and gentlemen, we’d like to play a little tune for you. I dedicate it to someone who doesn’t think he’s seen anything good today. Mr. Hynes, this one is for you (5). 
I don’t think life can get any better than performing in the middle of Times Square, but I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Life moves pretty fast; if you don’t stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it.

Leave a Comment

Comments (0)

All Hi's Eye Picks Reader Picks Sort: Newest

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *